How to Talk Dirty to My Boyfriend


Guest post by Victoria Gomez

Just the perfect word can send you over the toe-curling edge. If anything can heat things in your bedroom, talking dirty can. Dirty talk creates a sweet tension while lacing fantasy with erotic anticipation. It also helps you express things you like and want in bed, like instructing a partner to touch you in a particular manner or telling them precisely where that sweet spot is with your favorite vibrating toy. Serving not only as a powerful tool of seduction but also as instruction.

Because of that, it is seen as a sexy and simple way to give and receive sexual consent from your partner. (There’s no better way to express your sexual want, after all, than looking your partner in the eye and saying, “touch me.”)

Here is the ultimate guide for talking dirty.

HOW TO FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH TALKING DIRTY

You’re not alone if you don’t know how to talk dirty. It can seem like the hardest thing to do. However, it can spice things up in your relationship or retain the heat. Just imagine leaning close to your partner’s ears when you are out at a gathering and whispering something x-rated into their ears or perhaps at dinner. They’ll suddenly blush red at the promise of what is to come later…

Hot, right?

Dirty talk activates your imagination, supercharges your sexual excitement, and adds a touch of liberation to your naked shenanigans. Don’t worry about feeling uncomfortable. Here’s a mini guide to let go of your inhibitions and talk dirty like a pro!

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Keep Things Simple

You don’t need to go in deep to channel your inner porn star. It’s not about saying many explicit words at a time. You don’t need anything complex. Start by talking to your partner about how you feel when they touch you or when you touch them. Or maybe how you want them to know and understand how you want to feel once you get to the bedroom. Expressing how much you desire your partner and how they turn you on so bad can be the ultimate aphrodisiac, and it does not require any over-the-top promises.

Start Slowly

Dirty talk takes practice. Moans are awesome, followed by statements like, yessss, lower! I like that! Right there! Keep doing that! Start with phrases that are part of your typical vocabulary during sex and go from there!

Practice Outside Your Bedroom First

If you are feeling nervous about adding the vulnerability of being naked in front of your partner while talking dirty, then try it outside the bedroom to begin with. Slip a note to your partner at dinner or whisper something suggestive into their ears when you are together outside. You can even send them a text when you’re both at work, alluding to what’s going to happen later.

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Maintain Eye Contact

If you want your words to have the desired effect, don’t be afraid to maintain eye contact with your partner as you say those seductive words. Be calm and confident with what you’re saying.

Be Descriptive

For many people, the details make dirty talk a huge turn-on. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with simple statements like “You look so sexy right now,” and “Yes, I love that.”

But after getting comfortable with how to talk dirty, you can add some descriptive details to your words. “You look so sexy right now” can turn into “I love your perfect body”, or “you’re better than my deepest fantasies”.

“Baby, I love having sex with you” can become “I love how you grab the sheets when you’re about to cum”. You can even say, “there’s nowhere I would rather be than inside you right now.”

Now… isn’t that more erotic?

Push Yourself

You might already have a small internal tension building as you are reading this, just by saying some of these things out loud to your partner. At first, opening your mouth and letting the erotic words come out can make you feel like you’re standing at a cliff edge. Just breathe! Look into your partner’s eyes and clear that block in your throat. Don’t allow anything to hold you back from fully expressing yourself, totally seen and completely loved.

Most importantly, don’t stress it! Dirty talk aims to have fun. Sex is fun, adventurous, funny, messy, and everything in between. If you feel your words are too cheesy, laugh it off and continue.

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EXAMPLES OF DIRTY TALK

If you want to spice up your sex life and impress your partner, you will need some examples of dirty talk to get started. Remember to keep your partner’s preferences in mind and tailor these examples of dirty talk to fit their desires.

  • Take me harder

  • I need you to go down on me

  • I want you so bad

  • That feels great, baby

  • I’m getting so wet

  • I love it when you touch me that way

  • I can’t stop thinking about you

  • I just stepped out of the shower; want to see?

  • Please make me feel deliciously sore

  • I keep dreaming about you on my bed

  • I love how you taste

  • I fucking love it when you ride me hard

  • Ride me harder, don’t stop

  • I’m soaked right now

  • You feel so sweet inside me

  • I could spend all day with you deep inside me

  • I like how you make me feel right now

DIFFERENT TYPES OF DIRTY TALKING TO TRY

Dirty Talk on the Phone

Here’s an amazing way to have kinky fun with your partner on the phone or even to move into mind-blowing phone sex. It’s a great way to make a long-distance relationship work, especially when combined with the plethora of incredible sex toys currently available.

While apart, combining mutual masturbation with something verbal and incredibly erotic can be exciting. Because you don’t do this with other people, this private and unique language can provide intimacy when you can’t be together physically. By professing your desires, it will make your reunion even more beautiful. Before you start, don’t overthink it. Be calm and flow with it!

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Through Texts

Erotic texts are the best way to build tension and keep the fire burning. If you feel nervous testing the waters of verbalized dirty talk, an excellent way to start is to send them naughty texts. Send steamy texts when you feel playful, when you want to pique their interest, and when you feel kinky. You can even make things extra dirty by sending hot pictures. Take a sexy picture of yourself and send it to your partner. Leave something to their imagination and watch how they will reach for you when you finally get to be together.

During Foreplay and Sex

After setting the mood with texts, you should take things higher with dirty talk during sex. Words like “You taste really good,” “I’m wet/hard for you,” and “Cum for me” can make your partner know how much you’re having a great time. You can either yell or whisper these short sentences to your heart’s content.

I know dirty talk can feel uncomfortable at times, but the best thing is to start with something simple and just get your lips moving. Start small, and switch things up over time. Ask your partner if they have any preference for the words they’d like you to use or not use in your repertoire. Enjoy yourself and allow the words to flow freely because dirty talk during sex truly shifts the dynamic of your sex life easily and erotically.



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